


Strength

by everybodywantsapadparadschaparade



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-09
Updated: 2019-08-09
Packaged: 2020-08-13 23:49:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20182750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/everybodywantsapadparadschaparade/pseuds/everybodywantsapadparadschaparade
Summary: After the events of Kingdom Hearts 3, Kairi has a lot of growing to do. Seeking strength and closure, she embarks upon a journey of her own through the cosmos filled with familiar faces, new threats and the ever-present temptations of the darkness.





	Strength

**Author's Note:**

> A little prologue. I view this whole project as practice so it will be a little rough around the edges, but I hope y'all find something to enjoy in here. Heavy angst in this chapter but things are going to get downright peculiar in that special Kingdom Hearts way as the story progresses.

Sora and Riku's journey began with our islands falling to the darkness, the only home we'd ever known torn to pieces by forces beyond our comprehension. My own adventure was not afforded the same sense of gravitas, at least, not in the beginning. The impetus in my case was small, six-legged, and hideous.

The semester after Sora sacrificed himself to bring me back, I made it to three days of school. I left two periods into the third day. The few around who understood my situation told me it wasn't my fault. They were wrong. Merlin put me beyond time to train for the last battle with Xehanort and it didn't matter. I didn't even make it through a single fight with the seekers of darkness, and after all was said and done the strongest wielder among the guardians of light – my best friend – traded his life for mine.

That third day I went straight to my room without a word to my parents. I looked at myself in the mirror and I seethed. 

A year prior I had been so excited about the new school uniform I woke up early to iron the shirt and make sure everything sat on me perfectly, raising and then lowering the skirt by millimeters. I tried the tie tight and loose, I tried the shirt without the tie altogether, all buttoned up and then with the collar unbuttoned and all buttoned up again. Some of that was the unrelenting self-criticism a schoolgirl is bound to pick up from her environment, sure. Some of it was genuine excitement at the design challenge – within the constraints of the dress code, how do I want to look this year? 

That third day I went straight to my room and looked at the mirror, and I didn't like or hate how I looked. I struggled to remember what it felt like to think those things mattered. Would looking beautiful make it any easier to be there for my friends when it mattered? Would looking disheveled make it any harder?

I ripped off the uniform and zipped myself into a Moogle onesie. I didn't take that thing off, even to clean it or clean myself, for close to a month. Instead of perfecting my outfit each day I practiced swinging Destiny's Embrace until my arms hurt and then I kept going. When I got tendonitis in my elbows I cast Cura and kept going. Was I shaving milliseconds off my swing time? Was I getting stronger in any quantifiable way? I'm not sure what I thought about it at the time. I'm not sure how often I was even thinking back then.

Riku and Selphie came over, in the beginning. Selphie would bring homework over and I would promise to do it, and I would be lying. We played Classic Kingdom games on her phones, chatting until sunset. She did most of the talking, frequently about a new transfer student named Olette who was apparently stupid handsome but also like, legitimately kind of stupid. I looked Olette up on social, her selfies were indeed handsome but maybe not stupid handsome. Pretty soon Selphie was showing up in Olette's Kingsta stories more and more (typically with text saying stuff like 'selfies with Selphie lol #luvthisgirl' on it), and showing up to my house less and less. Good for her.

I could bring my keyblade out around Riku, so I didn't stop my 'training' whenever he came over. He would bring protein bars, energy drinks, antacids and toiletries. Wrappers and empty cans accumulated on the carpet. One Saturday he brought me two wastebaskets. A week later he came over and none of the waste had made it into the bins. “I don't have the strength to protect you from yourself. I don't know what that kind of strength would even look like,” he said, “when you realize you deserve to get better, call me and I'll come back. But I can't live your life for you.”

The rubbish stayed on the floor, but I did pitch the bins.  
I'm not sure how long the potato bug was in the room before I found it. I attributed the crinkling of empty wrappers to the ceiling fan until one day a severe cold front swept the Islands. I thought it was some kind of huge, flightless bee. I sent Selphie a picture of it, followed by the Simpsons gif where Lenny says, “please don't tell anyone how I live.” I coaxed it into a screw-top Monster can while I waited for a reply.

“That's a potato bug, also known as a Jerusalem cricket. They're so gross. Do you want help getting your room back in order? Olette and I can come over after school.”

I screwed the top back on the can. A crinkling sound emanates from somewhere in the room. To hell with this. I rushed downstairs and into the backyard to call my armor and glider with Destiny's Embrace. The armor compressed the filthy moogle onesie I forgot I was wearing tight against my skin. It itched like you wouldn't believe, but I wasn't about to waste the little bit of progress I'd made coming outside. 

Sometimes I think about if things would have turned out better if I'd called Riku from the backyard. It doesn't matter, not really. There's no changing the mistakes I made, and I probably wouldn't have listened to him anyway. Even so, I wonder if I'd gone to Riku first if he would have recognized enough of himself in me to stage a proper intervention, to sit me down and tell me everything he knew about the difference between balance and power. Instead, I decided to go back to school, but not the kind available on the Islands. I tore through the atmosphere on my glider and flew straight to the Land of Departure.

**Author's Note:**

> Dunno when the first full chapter is coming, im terrible with deadlines in all aspects of my life. Whenever it winds up coming, I hope you'll look forward to taking this journey with me.


End file.
